Kase is headed to the ranch to spend some time with Dad and believe it or not, I am on a plane headed to Cannes for my first vacation in Lord knows how long! A quick day escape and looking forward to it!
Why a vacation? Well, I am finally done with two of the biggest creative challenges I have undertaken in quite some time- writing my first long form book and self-producing my folk CD, which is a return to the style of my first CD, Pieces of You.
As many of you know, it’s called Never Broken and it’s a memoir. My purpose for writing was not only to share my life with you, but also to share the meaningful shifts in my perspective and thinking that have allowed me to remain resilient, successful, and happy despite just about every kind of set back and abuse a human can suffer. While it is far from a tell-all (as there is still more I have not revealed that did not seem germane to the purpose of the book) I am very transparent about times in my life that none of you have ever known about. It took a lot of courage to share these things so honestly, but I felt compelled because I am keenly aware that I am not the only one in life who is struggling. While my struggle might be unique in some ways to my life, suffering is far from uncommon. My hope is that in sharing how I have come to look at my life - what has taken me 40 years and a lot of pain to learn- might benefit and inspire any of you who might be needing encouragement and tools for dealing with your own struggles. I want to encourage each of you to remember that you are indeed the architects of your own lives, no matter the situation and that even if you don’t have a supportive family, spouse, funds or access to traditional help- all you need is some common sense, tenacity, and what’s in your heart to create the change you are looking for. The book will be released September 14th and I can’t wait for you to read it!
At the end of my book, I lay out about 20 critical shifts in my thinking that allowed me to overcome obstacles like moving out at fifteen, healing from abuse, getting out of the streets, and finding the courage to believe in myself enough to quit shoplifting and so many other things. My hope is that they will help you as well.
I am currently working on a website based on these 20 mottos I have adopted in my life. I’m also creating simple challenges that might help you not only be mindful about how to create healing and change in your own lives, but also give you access to a community of like-minded people that you can reach out to on your journey. More details soon!
I am still working on the title, but I can give you the track list!
1. Love Used To Be
2. A Boy Needs A Bike
3. Everything Breaks
4. Family Tree
5. It Doesn't Hurt Right Now
6. His Pleasure Is My Pain
7. Here When Gone
8. The Shape Of You
9. Plain Jane
10. Pretty Face Fool
11. Nicotine Love
13. My Fathers Daughter
14. Mercy (formerly called Broken Until Open for any of you prone to tracking this type of thing)
This CD was a fantastic labor of love for me and took a while for me to finish because I was trying to do my real job, which is to be a parent to my son Kase, going through a divorce with love and grace, which takes a tremendous amount of effort and focus, and writing a book three hours a day, three days a week, while Kase was in preschool.
My focus for this CD was to forget everything I have learned about the music business the last 20 years and get back to what my bones have to say about songs and words and feeling and meaning. I let go of genre, radio, trend, current events, and clever strategies. I let go of it all - which was no small feet as those voices are so deeply penetrating after 20 years of doing this professionally. It took real effort to clear my thoughts and have no rules and just create - going back to my folk/American roots that I began with. I had wanted Ben Keith, who did Pieces of You, to produce it for me, but sadly he is no longer with us and I had wanted to hire Paul Worley, an old dear friend whom I believe still cares about art more than commerciality. I had wanted to use many of the Stray Gators, Neil Young’s back up band that also played on my first CD, but we lost many of them over the years, so Paul helped me get some players together that were from that camp- like Chad Cromwell on drums and Dan Dougmoore on guitar. About a week before rehearsals, Paul backed out of my project, telling me he believed the only person who should produce the CD was myself. I was quite angry at the time, though I do recall him saying one day I would thank him. Well, here I am, thanking him.
I have always been hard to capture in a recording. My heart shines through live and I am effortless and emotional, informed by the heart of the people before me. In a vocal booth, I am more self-aware, self-conscious, and less inspired. It has always been a challenge to try and capture my dynamics and range on tape. This is why we abandoned the studio in bulk on my first CD and recorded live at the Inner Change Coffee house. Twenty years later, I am not much better in the studio, so I decided to record live again for the people I really care about - my fans. I recorded a live show at The Standard in Nashville and fans came in from all over the world to be there at our swanky soiree. There was still some band stuff I wanted to cut, so I devised a plan to try and capture the spirit of live performance by cutting live in the studio with friends watching. We spent a week in a rehearsal studio working up arrangements for the song and then when it came time to record, the band and I all set up in one large room at the famous RCA-A building. Drums, bass, keys, steel, electric, and me on acoustic and singing. We set the loudest instruments the furthest from the mic and the softer instruments closest - basically creating a mix in the studio by the placement of our bodies relative to the microphones. The idea was to capture one whole live take of a song and be done with it. No overdubs, no layering tracks, no auto-tune or tricks. Just one live take - and it was a blast! It was emotional and raw and a little messy - but honest. That’s all I wanted. This is not a clever record. This record has no genre. It has no single that will be played at radio. It is raw, honest poetry that poured out of my bones and my soul. There are several six minute songs with no chorus. There are folk songs and country songs and songs that are just long poems set to music. I have no idea if it will sell one copy, but I love it and hope you will feel what was in my heart, trying to come out the only way I know how to - with the intense keening and passion and love life requires.
Mixing this CD took me a while to get it right. I tried to use very little compression and to let the dynamics of my voice express its full range, but it’s hard to go from a whipset to a groan to a scream within 8 bars and capture it with balance and EQ. The music was beautifully recorded and captured by engineer Jeff Baulding, who also engineered my This Way CD. My acoustic stuff was engineered by Erik Hellerman and the CD was mixed by the great Gary Paczosa.
The record has some full band tracks, some acoustic tracks with light coloring by the great Jonathan Yudkin, who played on my Lullaby and Merry Goes ‘Round CDs, and some solo acoustic live tracks as well. Overall, the feel is minimal, focusing on the singing, lyric, and emotion.
Because I did not make this record thinking of things like tempo and singles and because I am now a mom, I can’t imagine doing the six months of promo required to get on the airwaves. I looked for an indie label to partner with and eventually formed a partnership with Sugar Hill Records, a blue-grass label. They are lovely and committed to helping me put out a singer-songwriter record at the height of a market that is saturated with slick and upbeat songs on the pop and country side. Once again, I’m hoping that earnest and sincere can break through, though I am keenly aware that the work it takes to do so will be limited on my part because my first job is to be a mom and to be there for Kase.
I will release the CD at the same time as the book, so that I can combine the press in one shot and I don’t have to leave home to promote my art two separate times. I’m trying to work smarter and keep balance for my family and hopefully share some soulful music and words with you all!
My fans just amaze me all the time. These 20 years we have formed a family based on the idea that we can be more hopeful, that we can have an effect on our lives, that we would rather choose an informed optimism, laced with heavy doses of irony and sarcasm, over bleak and lazy cynicism. I believe change is for the warrior, not for the blind followers, nor for the ones who hide in carefully crafted armor of negativity and cynicism, nor for the ones who hide with their head in the sand. You all inspire me with your grit every day. It has been an honor to share my life with you and to see you all share your lives with not only me, but with each other, all while folding new fans into the flock. I am staggered every time I walk on stage and see such a diverse group of people joined together - country folk, city folk, republicans, and gays all gathered in the same dark theatre, opening their hearts and remembering what makes us alike more than what separates us. This is what inspired me to ask you all a few months back what makes us, us, what is our mission statement, what are our shared values as a community.
To that end, I’d like to share with you what you all wrote. This is us, the Every Day Angels, a name you gave yourself 20 years ago because you wanted to see the world from another angle, trying to create a world for yourself you believed in, were inspired by, and to surround yourself in what you wanted to become.
EDA Mission Statement:
I love what you guys came up with and I could not have said it better myself.
In the next few months, I will be creating videos for songs and will be in touch with more exciting news!
I love you all dearly, and look forward to your comments.